Over the past few years, one of our biggest priorities as a family has been creating memories with our kids.
That does not always mean taking an expensive trip or planning something elaborate. Often, it is simply being intentional about spending time together and recognizing that this season of life will not last forever.
Still, many of the experiences that help create those memories do cost money that could otherwise be saved or invested. But financial planning is not only about maximizing how much money you have someday. It is about using money intentionally throughout your life.
BECOMING A GOOD SAVER IS ONLY HALF THE BATTLE
Many of the people we work with are excellent savers.
They have spent years living below their means, consistently contributing to retirement accounts, building emergency funds, creating passive income and making thoughtful financial decisions. Those habits have helped them create real financial security, and they are worth protecting.
But sometimes the same discipline that makes someone a great saver can also make it difficult for them to enjoy what they have built.
LEARNING TO SPEND CAN BE JUST AS DIFFICULT
Research from the Employee Benefit Research Institute helps illustrate just how difficult that transition can be. Retirees who entered retirement with at least $500,000 in non-housing assets had spent down a median of only 11.8% of those assets after 20 years. About one-third of all the retirees studied had actually increased their assets during retirement.
Of course, leaving money behind may be intentional for some families. But the research also shows how deeply the habit of accumulating can become ingrained. After spending 30 or 40 years watching an account balance grow, it can be emotionally difficult to suddenly become comfortable watching it decline, even when that was the purpose of saving the money in the first place.
Every purchase begins to feel like lost compound growth. Every vacation or family experience is measured against what the money could become in 20 years. Even when the financial plan clearly shows someone is doing well, spending can still feel irresponsible.
A good financial plan should not only tell you whether you are saving enough. It should also help you understand when you have permission to spend.
This is not only a challenge for retirees. I find myself helping many of our younger clients work through it as well. They are saving consistently, investing for the future and doing all the things they are supposed to do, but they can still feel guilty spending money on experiences with their families today.
The answer is not to abandon discipline or use every purchase as an excuse to live in the moment. It is to recognize that a strong financial plan can make room for both. You can prepare responsibly for the future while also using some of your money to enjoy the season of life you are in right now.
SOME OPPORTUNITIES HAVE AN EXPIRATION DATE
There will almost always be another opportunity to put more money into an investment account.
There may not always be another opportunity to create a certain memory with your children at their current ages.
Our kids will not always be young enough to get excited about a simple weekend away, an afternoon adventure or spending an entire day together without competing schedules and responsibilities.
Health can change. Family circumstances can change. Children grow up. Careers become more demanding. Parents and grandparents get older.
That does not mean we should spend recklessly because tomorrow is uncertain. It simply means timing matters.
Certain experiences are more valuable during specific seasons of life. Recognizing that does not mean abandoning financial discipline. It means understanding what all of that discipline was meant to provide.
EXPERIENCES CAN KEEP PAYING DIVIDENDS
When we buy something, much of the enjoyment is often concentrated around the moment of purchase. Experiences can work differently.
They create excitement beforehand, enjoyment while they are happening and memories that can continue paying dividends for years afterward.
We still talk about family experiences long after they are over. The moment passes, but the value of it does not.
Those memories also help shape the way our children see family, time and the world. My hope is that they remember not only the things we did together, but that we valued our time with them enough to make those experiences a priority.
That will never appear on a balance sheet or net worth statement, but it still has real value.
SPENDING SHOULD BE INTENTIONAL, NOT IMPULSIVE
Giving yourself permission to spend is not the same as saying every purchase is worthwhile.
The goal is not to spend more simply because you can. It is to identify what matters most and intentionally direct your resources toward it.
For one family, that might mean travel or experiences with their children. For another, it could mean helping adult children, supporting a charity, reducing work hours, buying a vacation home or creating more time with grandchildren.
Good spending is aligned with your values. It is planned for in advance, does not jeopardize your long-term financial security and does not require you to ignore other important goals.
But once the plan supports it, you should be able to enjoy that spending without guilt.
WHAT IS YOUR MONEY SUPPOSED TO DO?
Most financial plans include assumptions about retirement dates, investment returns, inflation and future spending.
Those numbers matter, but the more important question is often much simpler:
What do you want your money to make possible?
If the only answer is “more money,” there may never be a point when enough actually feels like enough.
Financial success should eventually produce something beyond a larger account balance. It should create more options, time, generosity, experiences and peace of mind.
Saving for the future is important, but so is recognizing the season of life you are in right now.
A good financial plan helps you do both. It prepares you for tomorrow while also giving you permission to enjoy some of what you have built today.
